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Fancy Fast Food?

These photographs show extreme makeovers of actual fast food items purchased at popular fast food restaurants. No additional ingredients have been added except for an occasional simple garnish.

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*Remember the rules: no additional ingredients are allowed other than a simple garnish (which won't necessarily be eaten anyway, i.e. parsley), and no Photoshopping other than minor adjustments in sharpness or color correction. Please submit a "before shot" and photos of the makeover process as well.

Also, remember to wash your hands before you start preparing your dish! The signs in the fast food restaurant bathrooms might read, "Employees must wash hands before returning to work," but really, everyone should.







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Soniccian Borscht (Fancy Sonic)by Erik of Fancy Fast Food (with support from Ralph and Nata Trinidad)
Unbeknownst to most of the world is the tiny Eastern European nation of Soniccia, a country whose traditions have carried on through the ages, even before the bleak days of the Soviet Union.  So small that it is barely mentioned as a former Soviet republic, Soniccia strives to sustain a unique national identity in the post-Cold War era, much like its sibling nations — including Latvia, Ukraine, and Georgia.  This distinction of national identity is most evident in Soniccian cuisine; while other former Soviet republics’ variations of the staple, beet-based soup of borscht remain in the savory category, Soniccia’s palate is bit more on the sweet side. 
Ingredients (from Sonic):
2 large Cherry Limeades
2 orders of Apple Slices
1 Fresh Banana (from the Everyday Value Menu)
1 Vanilla Dish (ice cream)
Obtaining the above ingredients isn’t quite as easy as it is in most parts of the modern Western World.  Soniccian culture still hasn’t evolve from some of its former Soviet routines; one can not simply buy these fast food goods off the shelf or by ordering them from a person behind a counter.  Instead you must order the items the old-fashioned way, by pushing a button on an antiquated intercom system while inside your vehicle.  (At certain times during the day, there are often long waits in a long queue of other vehicles.)  This ordering process is prevalent in Soniccia; even if you wish to go on foot and walk to the food establishment to buy goods, you must still push a button and order from the old intercom system.  Only when your order is confirmed over the speaker does a person bring you your items — sometimes (but not always) using vintage roller skates from the early 20th century.  Present day Soniccia is truly a unique nation with its cultural idiosyncracies.  Anyway, once you have the ingredients and bring them home, you can start preparing the borscht.  First, strain the two cherry limeades to extract and pour the red liquid into two separate pieces of cookware: a saucepan and a non-stick skillet.  Save the wedges of lime as you will use them for garnish later.  Bring both the saucepan and skillet to a boil with high heat.  While waiting for them to start bubbling, prepare the other items.  Slice the apple wedges with a sharp knife, following the curve of each apple wedge’s shape when it’s laying flat on a cutting board.  (This will make them resemble shreds of cabbage.)  Once you have a favorable amount of apple shreds, add them to the boiling pot of cherry limeade.  Reduce to a low heat and let it simmer, allowing the apples to absorb the dark red color.  The contents of the skillet should boiling by now, but let it continue to boil, uncovered. This will eventually be reduced down to a thick red syrup. In the meantime, slice the bananas into smaller chunks.  When the red syrup is ready, infuse the banana with it so that the chunks resemble beets.  The Soniccian borscht is almost ready for plating, but first let’s prepare the all-important green garnish.  Slice the rinds off the lime wedges you saved from before and then chop them into smaller pieces.   Finally, assemble your sweet Soniccian delicacy: ladle out the apple-stewed soup into a fancy bowl and then add some beet-looking banana chunks.  Instead of serving it with sour cream as they do in Russia and Poland, add a dollop of vanilla ice cream, and then garnish the top with the chopped lime zest.  And there it is!  Perfect for a hot summer day, whether you are in Eastern Europe or not!  NOTE: In case you hadn’t figured it out, this mock recipe is a work of fiction; the country of Soniccia doesn’t actually exist, and Sonic, “America’s Drive-In,” isn’t necessarily a part of, or endorse anything related to the former Soviet Union, Communism — or the Republican opinion of Obama’s healthcare plan, for that matter. 

If you are viewing this recipe in an aggregator (like tumblr’s Dashboard), or as a reblogged post, please check out the real website at FancyFastFood.com.
Recipe for the week of April 21, 2010:

Soniccian Borscht (Fancy Sonic)
by Erik of Fancy Fast Food (with support from Ralph and Nata Trinidad)

Unbeknownst to most of the world is the tiny Eastern European nation of Soniccia, a country whose traditions have carried on through the ages, even before the bleak days of the Soviet Union. So small that it is barely mentioned as a former Soviet republic, Soniccia strives to sustain a unique national identity in the post-Cold War era, much like its sibling nations — including Latvia, Ukraine, and Georgia. This distinction of national identity is most evident in Soniccian cuisine; while other former Soviet republics’ variations of the staple, beet-based soup of borscht remain in the savory category, Soniccia’s palate is bit more on the sweet side.

Ingredients (from Sonic):

  • 2 large Cherry Limeades
  • 2 orders of Apple Slices
  • 1 Fresh Banana (from the Everyday Value Menu)
  • 1 Vanilla Dish (ice cream)

Obtaining the above ingredients isn’t quite as easy as it is in most parts of the modern Western World. Soniccian culture still hasn’t evolve from some of its former Soviet routines; one can not simply buy these fast food goods off the shelf or by ordering them from a person behind a counter. Instead you must order the items the old-fashioned way, by pushing a button on an antiquated intercom system while inside your vehicle. (At certain times during the day, there are often long waits in a long queue of other vehicles.) This ordering process is prevalent in Soniccia; even if you wish to go on foot and walk to the food establishment to buy goods, you must still push a button and order from the old intercom system. Only when your order is confirmed over the speaker does a person bring you your items — sometimes (but not always) using vintage roller skates from the early 20th century. Present day Soniccia is truly a unique nation with its cultural idiosyncracies.

Anyway, once you have the ingredients and bring them home, you can start preparing the borscht. First, strain the two cherry limeades to extract and pour the red liquid into two separate pieces of cookware: a saucepan and a non-stick skillet.  Save the wedges of lime as you will use them for garnish later. Bring both the saucepan and skillet to a boil with high heat. While waiting for them to start bubbling, prepare the other items.

Slice the apple wedges with a sharp knife, following the curve of each apple wedge’s shape when it’s laying flat on a cutting board. (This will make them resemble shreds of cabbage.) Once you have a favorable amount of apple shreds, add them to the boiling pot of cherry limeade. Reduce to a low heat and let it simmer, allowing the apples to absorb the dark red color.

The contents of the skillet should boiling by now, but let it continue to boil, uncovered. This will eventually be reduced down to a thick red syrup. In the meantime, slice the bananas into smaller chunks. When the red syrup is ready, infuse the banana with it so that the chunks resemble beets.

The Soniccian borscht is almost ready for plating, but first let’s prepare the all-important green garnish. Slice the rinds off the lime wedges you saved from before and then chop them into smaller pieces.

Finally, assemble your sweet Soniccian delicacy: ladle out the apple-stewed soup into a fancy bowl and then add some beet-looking banana chunks. Instead of serving it with sour cream as they do in Russia and Poland, add a dollop of vanilla ice cream, and then garnish the top with the chopped lime zest. And there it is! Perfect for a hot summer day, whether you are in Eastern Europe or not!

NOTE: In case you hadn’t figured it out, this mock recipe is a work of fiction; the country of Soniccia doesn’t actually exist, and Sonic, “America’s Drive-In,” isn’t necessarily a part of, or endorse anything related to the former Soviet Union, Communism — or the Republican opinion of Obama’s healthcare plan, for that matter.



If you are viewing this recipe in an aggregator (like tumblr’s Dashboard), or as a reblogged post, please check out the real website at FancyFastFood.com.

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